I wrote a paper today and oddly enough it was fun to write.
My mom can't come to the party with me, but she still wants to buy some things for her.
I have to stay after class tomarrow and meet with my professor that talks for forever. UGH
Tomarrow I have to cut grass, but I don't have to babysit!
I'm sick.
Well I'm done.
Wednesday, August 31
Tuesday, August 30
Ramblings of a College Student
I'm trilled with myself and how I've been able to keep ahead of my homework. Procrstinating is sooo not worth it. It also helps now that I have picked Early childhood education as my major becuase now i'm working towards a goal I want to accomplish, and some of the classes aren't that bad. The more I go to Greeson's class the more I hate it, i'm soo going to skip one day! I like my science and Math profs they are nice and make the subject interesting.
Are you still having that Pampered Chef party? If so where and when. I asked my mom to come if thats ok.
Are you still having that Pampered Chef party? If so where and when. I asked my mom to come if thats ok.
Friday, August 26
What a bore!
I have a Saturday class. That kinda sucks, but I'll get over it. EDL 204 is going to be hard. We also have to do that big project, and my prof told me that the syllabus is from Oxford and that the book is written by profs at oxford especially for this class. I guess everyone gets the same experience. Well I need to get to bed. Until the sun rises again.
Tuesday, August 23
? ? ?
If you notice the blog below this you will notice that I have 9 comments; I have never had this many comments, so this arose some skepticism. After reading all of the comments I have now realized that no one is safe. Whether it's in you mail box, e-mail, or just pops up on your screen every now and then junk is impossible to escape. Well I need to get to bed I have class tomorrow.
Classes Started Today
I think our teacher is very interesting. He seems very down to earth. The one thing I'm upset with is the really annoying boy from History 111 is in our class. This kid is very rude, but he doesn't realize it. He attacks anything that he believes is untrue and he will argue his point (for way too long). I'm done
Monday, August 22
Ashley Clay ~ September 16, 1986
Your Individuality: Sun in Virgo
You were born under the sign of VIRGO and your ruling planet is Mercury, which endows you with outstanding mental qualities.
Your Sun sign is MUTABLE and this will impel you to function as a COMMUNICATOR, either in thought or action. You won't feel comfortable in a leadership position, but rather in a subordinate position or service. One of your functions is to help others to solve their problems.
Virgo is an EARTH sign and this makes you realistic, practical and concrete. You will have a strong desire to accomplish material goals and need to feel that your career or enterprises permit you to grow a little more each year.
You were born under the sign of VIRGO and your ruling planet is Mercury, which endows you with outstanding mental qualities.
Your Sun sign is MUTABLE and this will impel you to function as a COMMUNICATOR, either in thought or action. You won't feel comfortable in a leadership position, but rather in a subordinate position or service. One of your functions is to help others to solve their problems.
Virgo is an EARTH sign and this makes you realistic, practical and concrete. You will have a strong desire to accomplish material goals and need to feel that your career or enterprises permit you to grow a little more each year.
Sarah Lewis ~ July 1, 1986
Your Individuality: Sun in Cancer
You were born under the sign of CANCER and your ruling planet is the Moon, which endows you with great sensitivity and a strong protective instinct toward your loved ones.
Your Sun sign is CARDINAL and this indicates that you were born to be a leader, either in thought or action. You are never completely satisfied in a subordinate position carrying out the ideas of others, unless they are part of your aspirations. You are comfortable working independently or occupying a leadership position.
Cancer is a WATER sign, which makes you receptive and intense. The success of your projects depends almost exclusively on your emotional state. You need the feeling of warmth and intimacy to perform adequately. You will have to control your degree of outside influence and your changeability.
You were born under the sign of CANCER and your ruling planet is the Moon, which endows you with great sensitivity and a strong protective instinct toward your loved ones.
Your Sun sign is CARDINAL and this indicates that you were born to be a leader, either in thought or action. You are never completely satisfied in a subordinate position carrying out the ideas of others, unless they are part of your aspirations. You are comfortable working independently or occupying a leadership position.
Cancer is a WATER sign, which makes you receptive and intense. The success of your projects depends almost exclusively on your emotional state. You need the feeling of warmth and intimacy to perform adequately. You will have to control your degree of outside influence and your changeability.
Thursday, August 18
Walking in my Shoes
I'm going to tell you about an event. And I'm going to tell it from my perspective.
I had just finished eating supper, so I decided to go to my room and check my mail. As I was walking down the stairs I heard the t.v. blasting and my brother yelling; he was playing video games. The closer I got to the last step the more I smelt bleach; I questioned this slightly but since I had used bleach the night before I waived it off. But I did start to become very nervous because I didn't lock my bedroom door.
As I rounded the corner into the living room I noticed that my brother had friends over and that they were acting very smug. At this point I also noticed the smell of a burnt match. I instantly knew they had been in my room because I had Lit a candle.
I walked to my room and I noticed the bleach smell becoming stronger and stronger. My heart dropped. After confirming the candle being blown out I looked more closely around. I looked over at my t.v. it had been sprayed with bleach ( heart pounding, panicking, and veins filled with adrenaline I turned to search my whole room) ... My plants ... My mirror ... My bed ... My clothes on the bed ... My COMPUTER ... My desk ... And all the things that were on the desk had been sprayed with bleach.
I ran past my brother (doing quite well not to kill him) and went to get my mother. As I ran up the stairs I couldn't help but start crying. I reached my mother. I was hoping that my mother like most "normal" mothers would help me seek my vengeance, but I was wrong. As I told her what happened she didn't seem to interested and then she did the unthinkable, she turned the situation around and blamed me. "I can't ever sit down, relax, and eat my supper can I?"......... "You should have locked your door". This made my so so so mad. I lost my temper and said "If you don't do anything about this then I WILL". She sat there and stared at the t.v.
I went back down stairs to confront my brother.
"Why did you do it?"
"Do what?"
"You know what you did, WHY?"
"You used my matches to light your candle and I only had three left."
"OMG!"
This is about the time I heard my mothers feet banging towards the basement door. She came to see my room and while looking around, murmuring to herself, she said, "get a washcloth and was it with some soap and hot water." And then left. No punishment was given.
Everything I own is now sprayed an ugly shade of white.
I have decided to seek my own vengeance. I'm going to write a letter to my mother explaining myself and also tell her all of Ben's horrible secrets. The only thing that can ruin this is if she still does nothing to him... Which seems very likely, so along with my letter I'm going to collect all the physical evidence that my brother discards in the corn growing behind our house.
I had just finished eating supper, so I decided to go to my room and check my mail. As I was walking down the stairs I heard the t.v. blasting and my brother yelling; he was playing video games. The closer I got to the last step the more I smelt bleach; I questioned this slightly but since I had used bleach the night before I waived it off. But I did start to become very nervous because I didn't lock my bedroom door.
As I rounded the corner into the living room I noticed that my brother had friends over and that they were acting very smug. At this point I also noticed the smell of a burnt match. I instantly knew they had been in my room because I had Lit a candle.
I walked to my room and I noticed the bleach smell becoming stronger and stronger. My heart dropped. After confirming the candle being blown out I looked more closely around. I looked over at my t.v. it had been sprayed with bleach ( heart pounding, panicking, and veins filled with adrenaline I turned to search my whole room) ... My plants ... My mirror ... My bed ... My clothes on the bed ... My COMPUTER ... My desk ... And all the things that were on the desk had been sprayed with bleach.
I ran past my brother (doing quite well not to kill him) and went to get my mother. As I ran up the stairs I couldn't help but start crying. I reached my mother. I was hoping that my mother like most "normal" mothers would help me seek my vengeance, but I was wrong. As I told her what happened she didn't seem to interested and then she did the unthinkable, she turned the situation around and blamed me. "I can't ever sit down, relax, and eat my supper can I?"......... "You should have locked your door". This made my so so so mad. I lost my temper and said "If you don't do anything about this then I WILL". She sat there and stared at the t.v.
I went back down stairs to confront my brother.
"Why did you do it?"
"Do what?"
"You know what you did, WHY?"
"You used my matches to light your candle and I only had three left."
"OMG!"
This is about the time I heard my mothers feet banging towards the basement door. She came to see my room and while looking around, murmuring to herself, she said, "get a washcloth and was it with some soap and hot water." And then left. No punishment was given.
Everything I own is now sprayed an ugly shade of white.
I have decided to seek my own vengeance. I'm going to write a letter to my mother explaining myself and also tell her all of Ben's horrible secrets. The only thing that can ruin this is if she still does nothing to him... Which seems very likely, so along with my letter I'm going to collect all the physical evidence that my brother discards in the corn growing behind our house.
Tuesday, August 16
Thursday, August 11
Who said I could write poems
You say you love me
but how can I believe you.
You look at me with disgust
and the other two with pride.
All I can do is keep living this lie
and hope that you love me.
The things you call me keep sinking in.
misfit...lazy...bitch
And now I realize that I am all of these things.
But all I can do is keep living this lie
and hope that you love me.
Maybe one of these days
I will become your perfect little girl
Or maybe not.
All I can ask is Do you still love me?
but how can I believe you.
You look at me with disgust
and the other two with pride.
All I can do is keep living this lie
and hope that you love me.
The things you call me keep sinking in.
misfit...lazy...bitch
And now I realize that I am all of these things.
But all I can do is keep living this lie
and hope that you love me.
Maybe one of these days
I will become your perfect little girl
Or maybe not.
All I can ask is Do you still love me?
Wednesday, August 10
Did You Know?
I spent this last weekend all alone with my mother. This was very weird because I never spend time with her unless we are grocery shopping or cleaning.
There's only 100 days left until Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire comes out in Theater.
My Dad's Birthday is this Sunday...I need to buy him something.
My 19th Birthday is only a month away. I'm a Virgo.
We bought speakers for the computer upstairs and only one of them worked, so we took them back and bought new ones, and still only one works.
Will Smith is Hott!
I painted my brothers toenails bright pink.
I spent $2.59 on gas today.
There's only 100 days left until Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire comes out in Theater.
My Dad's Birthday is this Sunday...I need to buy him something.
My 19th Birthday is only a month away. I'm a Virgo.
We bought speakers for the computer upstairs and only one of them worked, so we took them back and bought new ones, and still only one works.
Will Smith is Hott!
I painted my brothers toenails bright pink.
I spent $2.59 on gas today.
Friday, August 5
*Mentally Exhausted*
Today I'm in a bad mood. At the beginning of the day I was looking forward to a day of shopping with my aunt and grandma.
We decided to go to Target first. I was having a great time pushing all three of the kids around by myself until we saw Grandma. Emilie decided to go with her and I took the other two to find their mother. I found Joanie and we where standing in an isle admiring lightbulbs when Grandma and Emilie came over. Both of them were gloating on the two new Barbie dolls that Grandma was going to buy Emilie. This of course upset Elisabeth and Kaitlynn, but Joanie was furious. We decided to leave.
We went across the street to TGIF for lunch. While there Grandma talked to no one, and Joanie talked to me and the kids. When we finally got our lunch Grandma starts saying to Emilie "Come sit next to me no one else likes me", "Lets not fight about stupid things", Pointing at Joanie and me..."I know you two are talking about me". At this point I was very Angry, because I wasn't talking about her. The whole time I was trying to get Joanie to let it go, and to be the mentor of two big babies. After finishing our lunch in silence we left to Sam's.
I decided to stay in the car and listen to my new c.d., My Chemical Romance, and to let my mind work through all of my thoughts.
Grandma came out first. I started to help her unload the groceries... I went to pick up some books when she ripped them out of my hand and said "Not these I bought these for those stupid kids." "Why does everyone have to tell me how to spend my money?" At this point I'm ready to explode, because she actually said infront of me "those stupid kids" and everyone knows that she is very unfair to Joanie's kids and that she gives Emilie whatever she wants. I calmly say "No one is telling you how to spend your money, but you do have to be fair with the younger grandchildren, or if you are going to buy Emilie something don' t let the other kids know. " She just gets in the car talking to herself. I get in to wait on Joanie and grandma says " I want to go home...I'm going home and staying there until I die...which better be soon"
More and more each day I see more of G-Grandma Rodefer in Grandma, and more and more each day I see more of Grandma in my Mom. OHHH I don't want to deal with this when I get older.
The only good that came from to day was My Chemical Romance c.d.
We decided to go to Target first. I was having a great time pushing all three of the kids around by myself until we saw Grandma. Emilie decided to go with her and I took the other two to find their mother. I found Joanie and we where standing in an isle admiring lightbulbs when Grandma and Emilie came over. Both of them were gloating on the two new Barbie dolls that Grandma was going to buy Emilie. This of course upset Elisabeth and Kaitlynn, but Joanie was furious. We decided to leave.
We went across the street to TGIF for lunch. While there Grandma talked to no one, and Joanie talked to me and the kids. When we finally got our lunch Grandma starts saying to Emilie "Come sit next to me no one else likes me", "Lets not fight about stupid things", Pointing at Joanie and me..."I know you two are talking about me". At this point I was very Angry, because I wasn't talking about her. The whole time I was trying to get Joanie to let it go, and to be the mentor of two big babies. After finishing our lunch in silence we left to Sam's.
I decided to stay in the car and listen to my new c.d., My Chemical Romance, and to let my mind work through all of my thoughts.
Grandma came out first. I started to help her unload the groceries... I went to pick up some books when she ripped them out of my hand and said "Not these I bought these for those stupid kids." "Why does everyone have to tell me how to spend my money?" At this point I'm ready to explode, because she actually said infront of me "those stupid kids" and everyone knows that she is very unfair to Joanie's kids and that she gives Emilie whatever she wants. I calmly say "No one is telling you how to spend your money, but you do have to be fair with the younger grandchildren, or if you are going to buy Emilie something don' t let the other kids know. " She just gets in the car talking to herself. I get in to wait on Joanie and grandma says " I want to go home...I'm going home and staying there until I die...which better be soon"
More and more each day I see more of G-Grandma Rodefer in Grandma, and more and more each day I see more of Grandma in my Mom. OHHH I don't want to deal with this when I get older.
The only good that came from to day was My Chemical Romance c.d.
Monday, August 1
Never Been Kissed
Well, I'm gettin kinda concerned for ya. You seem to have a cyber stalker. Just keep a safe set of mind and stay smart. And if you do ever want to meet I will go with you!
This week has been as productive as all the weeks before, so in reality I haven't completed any of my goals. I have been thinking a lot about never having a boyfriend. My heart yearns to love another, but I do not believe I will anytime soon. Do you remember when you would write in a journal to your future husband? I always thought that was a good idea; you wouldn't be able to forget to tell him anything.
The ever nearer thought of school has already started to get me down. I just hate it, but I love it at the same time. I think it will be better this year than last because last year I was taking classes that had nothing to do with my chosen major.
Well I have to clean my house and then i'm going to Misty's because she is leaving for Florida Wed, so I will write at ya later.
This week has been as productive as all the weeks before, so in reality I haven't completed any of my goals. I have been thinking a lot about never having a boyfriend. My heart yearns to love another, but I do not believe I will anytime soon. Do you remember when you would write in a journal to your future husband? I always thought that was a good idea; you wouldn't be able to forget to tell him anything.
The ever nearer thought of school has already started to get me down. I just hate it, but I love it at the same time. I think it will be better this year than last because last year I was taking classes that had nothing to do with my chosen major.
Well I have to clean my house and then i'm going to Misty's because she is leaving for Florida Wed, so I will write at ya later.
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